Friday, February 13, 2015

(Not) Sleeping [Beth]

She never said it would be easy, and never thought that either. But why it had to be so hard she did not know. And although this time around it wasn't anything serious, she wondered why it was affecting her this much.

Falling asleep had always been something she did effortlessly, and had been that way ever since she remembered she existed. So why now? Why something so petty had her turning over and over in her bed up till late at night (or better saying, early in the morning) until the exhaustion took over... Her mind had never been so full. The same disturbing thoughts swirling around all night long: Was the end near? Could she keep going? And was what she had enough to do so? It was time to reevaluate everything. The highs and the lows, the goods and the bad, the smiles and the tears. How much of each had her had... Was there enough of each to keep it balanced? She wasn't sure, not anymore.

He kept telling her to let it go; to forget the past and focus only on what was still to come. And she did, most of the time; until he'd do something that would bring back the memories of what could have been the end; death. To think it had been that close... such a dark place near such a pure person can never turn into something good. And although he said it wouldn't happen again, she wondered how true that would be, or for how long it would remain so.

- Andie


Sunday, February 8, 2015

Sunday Rant #3 Double Standards

I thought today was still Saturday! I really don't know where the entire day yesterday went.. (I probably shouldn't had been out till so late on Friday night *ups*).

Anyway, on to the reason I'm here and that is to talk about topics I don't like. Let’s talk about double standards. They are everywhere, however you don’t actually notice that until they get into collision course with you. And that happened to me lately more often that I’d have appreciated. It's like I was blind and I now I see...but wish I didn't? But then again the hardest part is, obviously, dealing with the people who use double standards as an excuse to not do something, then get truly offended if the same excuse actually applies to you too.

For example, I had a report that was due in the beginning of December and it was a group activity (and I had the misfortune of getting two partners while everyone else got just one). Right after the deadlines were set, I asked them multiple times how we were going to divide the work load, and got no answer whatsoever. 

Fast forward two weeks and I’m overloaded with work and other reports that were due in the meantime and they decide it’s the perfect time to demand, yes demand, that I magically complete the part I wasn't told I had to do, in just a few hours - because they really needed it. Logically, I said I couldn't do it because I had other things that were more urgent and what not; basically that I was busy and they had to wait. Their replay? "No can do, we are busy too with other things" (which roughly translates to: "we are busy with other things and you have to do this thing now because you cannot be busy and we want you to do it, but we won't do our part until two days before the deadline"). 

I was dumbfounded! So it’s acceptable for them to be busy but I can't, even though they knew I had the same work load as them?! In the end we worked it out, but too close to the deadline to my liking. Therefore, in the following times we had to work together I did all the work divisions myself ahead of time and took none of theirs excuses.


Andie